So Aislinn has decided that she needs to lock her diary to keep me from writing about her in here. Oh wait, I'm sorry so that people wont get mad at her over what she writes in there. You know, I'm sitting here thinking about it, and I never once yelled or got mad at her for what she wrote in her diary... I vented about it in here. I got over it in this dairy that you are reading right now. The only time I got mad AT Aislinn was when she started complaining about things that I'd posted here. So maybe the real solution is for her to not read my diary. I'm not going to lock this, I like my diary rings, and perfer to let people use them. I also like the idea of poor unfortunate souls getting sucked in and reading this thing, aspects that are lost once a diary is locked. So have no fear faithful readers (ha! like I have faithful readers, if I did they'd no doubt SIGN MY GUESTBOOK), I will not be blocking you from your voyeristic ways.

Today was just a horrible day overall. I went to the gynocologist today and had my first ever pap smear! yay! I'm sorry, call me a wus, but that whole thing fucking sucked. I know all women go through it, but still. Ugh... there has to be a less intrusive way to do that. For Those of you who don't know this is what happens when you get a pap smear: The gyno takes this metal thing that looks like a set of duck lips (I saw the Vagina monologues, one is called My Angry Vagina that's where I got duck lips from) that opens and closes when the handle is squeezed. The doctor put's this up your vagina and opens it up so that she can see you from the inside. Then they take a cotton swab with a really long handle and stick it all the way up to your cervix (for all you 13 year olds who don't know, girls don't just have a hole that goes straight up to their uterus, there's the vaginal cavity then there's the equavilant of a big set of double doors between the vagina and uterus. the doors have a tiny opening the doors are the cervix), swish it around, pull it out, and do it again with another one. Then they get this lovely little plastic thing that resmebles a broom that has been cut so that it comes to a point, made of a very hard plastic. They then stick that up there, and swirl it around on the cervix as well. It hurts, It sucks, it's horribly invasive, and (note for any gynocologists who may be reading this) Explaining what the whole thing entails to a patient who's already got her feet in stirrups doesn't help. With my feet in the stirrups, and that stupid drape thing running from one knee to the other, and my Dr. illistrating what she going to do to me by using her hand and the duck lip thing, I felt like I was watching some extremely twisted puppet show. Blah.

Then I went home, and wanted to see Avigen, but he was at the mall, and I was working at 6 so guess where I didn't want to go at 2... that's right, the mall... So I got really quiet on the phone, and got off, 'cause he was there, and I didn't want to keep him on the phone just so I could bitch about the horrible mood that whole thing had put me into. He called me back though, and asked what was wrong. I wanted to tell him, but he had met up with Aislinn, Promethius and Randome boy A, and I really wanted to just curl up with Avigen alone. I was not in an overly social mood. It wasn't just the appointment, there was other stuff too, ... , I just feel like a whole pile of shit is hitting my fan all at once. I don't want the blades to get clogged.

****************************************